This That and the Other: An Ode to Lists Because Mr Lady Said No Lists

1. This is what I thought when I read this . You! Go read it, then come back because I’ma do what @mrlady said she’s tired of seeing, what she asked us to stop doing with the reasons why and how to lists. And by we I’m not really including me because my lists don’t make it to the internet because they’re usually filled with take a shower, buy more soap so you can take a shower and get clean, buy more of that thing you bought the last time that you forgot to refill the last last time, and remember to put this list somewhere where you won’t forget it.

6c. This is the face I’d have made when I read that, then read Denise’s response and Alexandra’s response, if I were this cute.

Z said hmmmm a list, you say?

Z said hmmmm a list, you say?

372. I number lists like I’m high. To throw you off. From knowing whether I’m high or not. YOU DON’T KNOW.

L. I get off work early today. I wore jeans. We’re not supposed to wear jeans.

B. I am playing 278553864 Words With Friends games. I am equally winning by hundreds and losing by more.

16. Budgets are bitches that like lubeless anal.

27a. I ordered a moonbounce for the boy’s fourth birthday party. I hope it’s still hot.

XI. I don’t really want to do a birthday party for him. He’d be happy with a new Spiderman or Batman or Thor or Hulk or OK any of the Avengers toy. Maybe I won’t do a party. Some kid in his class is going to have a party and he’s going to feel slighted and remember that when he’s talking to the girlfriend I’ll hate or the therapist I’ll pay for when he’s in his late 30s living in my basement. WHAT?

Appendix H. I should make this a how to not make a list list. This list is a list of disjointed thoughts. But it’s still numbered, so it’s still technically a list. Am sure I am writing a list.

2(c). I have a taste for birthday cake. Somewhere, someone I know is celebrating a birthday. I can have celebratory from afar cake.

11. Why is it so hard to not drink Pepsi?

89.1.B(7)(d). I can’t remember if I scheduled the water bill to be paid. It doesn’t tell me online. I can’t call because the rep might say it isn’t scheduled and I really want to use that money for something else. Like groceries.

9. Someone should write a list on how to get your kids the things they need AND want but also teach them gratefulness and humility and you too can achieve this without shaking your ass for money.

III. I could totally be rich if I had ass to shake. And boobs. And I’d so get her those red Chucks she wants.

5. I want to cut my hair. I don’t want to cut my hair. I want another baby. I don’t…wait, no, I really do. I want another baby.

408B Section 12A. Things that irk me. A list within a list because of no apparent reason I can think of:

a. Typos on public signs.

w. Forgetting my reusable bags in the car when buying groceries.

c. Remembering my reusable bags but forgetting to make sure the cashier takes off $.05 each for my reusable bags.

f. WalMart. I don’t shop there. I won’t. Even if what I’m buying in Target is $29.99 and $2.99 in WalMart. Nope.

j. Gum popping.

b. Menstruation.

z.1. Lists.

You’re not the boss of me, But you are pretty hot in those glasses. Furthermore squared: Blog traffic doesn’t define me. Any list I write or read usually doesn’t even make me act, no matter how detailed and easy it is. So there.

Previous Post Next Post

You Might Also Like